Tin, Len, and Mom were all together in the hallway when I walk up.  Mom had her back to me.

Tin:  Bye, Mom.

Mom:  Bye.

Len:  Bye, Mom.

Mom:  Bye.

Me:  Bye, Mom.

(Pause.)

Me (a little louder):  Bye, Mom!

Mom starts walking away.  I followed and passed her.

Me:  Bye, Mom!

Mom (turning to look at me):  Oh, Teej, it’s you!  I thought you were a boy.

WHAT?!?

*******************************

During Connected (youth group).

Len:  Teej, take off your shoe.

Me:  Why?

Len:  Just do it.

I take off my right shoe.

Len (putting her finger next to my little toe and wiggling it):  See, Michelle?  She has 6 toes.

Me:  What?

Tin:  There’s a rumor going around that you have 6 toes.

Me:  WHAT?!?  Who said that?

Michelle:  Well, my friend Daniela said that her big sister Gabby—you know Gabby, right?  She was one of your students before.

Me:  Yeah.

Michelle:  Well, I don’t know where she got it from…maybe you made a joke or something about it a long time ago…but she said that she thought you had 6 toes.  Daniela said that she wasn’t sure, and that I should ask.

Tin:  So she asked us. 

Michelle:  They said that you were very sensitive about it…and I believed them.

Tin:  Yeah.  I kind of forgot to say I was kidding.

Len:  But Michelle was really nice about it. 

Tin:  She said she understood why you would be sensitive about it, and she was very supportive.

Me:  Oh.  Uh, thanks.

Len:  How do you feel about it?

Me:  I feel weird…and grossed out!  You touched my foot!  Ewww!

A little while later…

Michelle:  Hey, can you take off both shoes so we can see?  They said it was both feet.

And that is why I left church wishing I had cut my toenails this morning like I had planned.  Too bad I woke up late.  Oh, well.  At least they were clean.